It was always, absolutely, definitely going to happen. The very nature of the beasts involved made it an exercise in Pavlovian inevitability, but by the citrus-flavoured kisses of the Man from Delmonte, literally the only way they could have been more blatant about it is if they’d tattooed “Laws R 4 Loozerz” on their shaven taints and performed this dance of the seven bullshits via the medium of naked synchronised swimming.
I speak, of course, of the decision made by the London Metropolitan Police Force, popularly known as The Met, the Order of Paramilitary Freemasons, Those Wacky Whitewashers, or just The Filth, to shit with great force and infinite contempt upon the very concept of blind justice by concluding Operation Hillman – their half-arsed ‘investigation’ into multiple incidents of alcohol fuelled rule-breaking at Number 10 Downing Street during the 2020 Lockdowns – with a final blast of Fixed Penalty Notices addressed to various low-level civil servants and nameless petty officials while somehow sparing any further embarrassment to that globulous splat of lardy vileness whose house it (currently) is, namely our esteemed (Sub)Prime Minister, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson.
Now, you may ask, how is it even possible that 126 FPNs could be issued to people identified by The Met as being present at one or more of the 12 illegal gatherings they claimed to be investigating, but Flobalob, who was at 6 of them, only got a single FTN, and that for the “ambushed by a cake” surprise birthday party organised by his tardily legitimised [Spermbaker Apparent]… err, Wife Mark#3?
That’s a very good question, and so’s this one.
How could The Met justify fining, say, a junior assistant to the Prime Minister’s Permanent Private Secretary for being at the same illegal gathering as the Prime Minister without also fining the Prime Minister? How does that work, exactly? If the gathering is illegal, attendance is illegal. If all are equal before the eyes of the Law, how can some attendees be given fines while others (the hosts, in fact) escape unscathed?
Basically, because it’s The Met, baby. Protecting those with Establishment cred is what they do. Effectively it’s all they do. There’s nothing else. If you’re not wired into the In-Crowd by birth, wealth or patronage then The Met couldn’t give a single solitary fuckadoodle about you. In fact, if you’re not in the In-Crowd, then as far as they’re concerned, you’re nothing more than a potentially illegal trespasser within their metropolitan demesne who deserves, nay, demands, to feel the full majesty of the Law Unbound manifest around your head, neck and exposed kidneys in the form of an enthusiastically wielded truncheon, and that’s if they don’t just shoot you dead for being flagrantly brown. They’re not so much corrupt as they are misnamed. It’s not a Police Force per se, it’s a publicly funded private security militia with occupation duties over a city of 9 million sullen natives and a duty to serve and protect only the ‘right’ kind of people.
Because of that, it’s not like any of this is in the least bit surprising. Indeed, Flobalob knew and boasted back in April that he would only be investigated for 2 out of the 6 illegal gatherings he was known to have attended and had been assured he would only get one FPN. It was in the papers and everything.
So, who told him that, then? Continue reading…